P.s. Who's Ross? We were together for almost two years. I can't even remember him.

Pictures

Tonight I looked at every single picture of myself on facebook. That's crazy and compulsive but I did it. I hardly recognize myself in most of them. I dyed my hair and did so much weird shit to myself for so long. And I was pretty fucking unhappy. I mean, I had wonderful friends like Renee and Tom throughout all of it. They will always and forever be my best friends. But I lost myself completely in these abusive (in many ways) relationships. I also think I used to look a lot cuter. Skinnier and blonder or whatever. And now, I don't really give a fuck what I look like. But I've never gotten more compliments than I have recently. And not about my tits or my hair or whatever, but about my character, and my humor, and my voice, my laugh. I am more myself than ever before. I thought I found that my freshman year of college. I was wrong. I was with Frankie and that was my identity. And now I'm in this relationship in which we share friends and experiences and yet maintain our own identities. And that's growing up, I suppose.

p.s. This will be interesting to read tomorrow. I'm drunk as SHIT.